For the last month I have been acting like a character from the O.C. more then one out of Jane Austen novel. Me and Tom became the Heidi and Spencer of Michigan. I'm just missing all the plastic parts. All the arguing, the lies, and the blaming. But, I never wanted to remember our affair like one that comes on bad reality TV. I wanted things to play out beautifully, like a Jane Austen novel. The ever so proud Mr. Darcy and the prejudice Miss Elizabeth Bennett. A relationship of love and hate but that played out like a beautiful melody. But you can't have something so elegant when you run around acting like Hollywood trash.
You cannot play the role of Elizabeth Bennett if you are missing your backbone. Mr. Darcy didn't fall in love with her because she was the most beautiful or sensible woman. She intrigued him with her Independence. She stood up for what she believed in and never took his shit. Elizabeth Bennett always kept it together. Those are the same reasons I always intrigued Tom, because I didn't need him. But I started to lose that Jane Austen flare. I let Tom and his Parasite consume my life.
I believe in true love more then anyone could ever imagine. I know that everything happens for a reason. You can't control who you fall in love with. Sometimes things are easy like a fairytale. Boy meets girl, they court, fall in love, and marry. But, in my reality I have more of a Jane Austen situation. Is it going to end in a romantic rain storm in a gazebo or will it end as Jane Austen's life did? Her with out him but loving each other from a far. I can't really say; but it is better to have lost at love then never loved at all. Today I hopeful that my Jane Austen novel will find it's perfect ending; no matter what that end turns out to be.
