First I want to say who does Tom think he is? I'm not good enough yet again....well guess what buddy you aren't bringing a whole lot to the table. What happened to dating I guy that I had fun with? You know the kind that took me dancing till my feet hurt and gave me a reason to dress up? I guess I lost sight of all that being consumed by Tom's parasite. Well guess what he can have his break. He'll be back begging and I made sure to let him know every single demand I had. I will not be second choice.
Where does that leave me? Doing me, letting life revolve around me, not answering to him for a while that is for sure. I am going to work my ass off in school just like I have been. So I can provide myself with the kind of life I deserve. I don't need Tom to take care of me and I never did. I am going to travel from coast to coast literally and visit all my friends I have missed so much. I am going to the gym and working on my body. I am going to do a pageant again so I can remind my self of my outside beauty.
I am done taking care of his needs over mine. I am not the one who is sick he is. We can't help those who can't help themselves. If a poker game is more important to him then me so be it. Because I am worth every single headache. I am more then he could ever dream of in a mate. Someday I am going to be happy and in love with or with out him. I have lots going for me he was right about that. Everything I have coming is because I willed it there, because I believed in me. Does my heart hurt over what is going on? Yes it does tremendously, I wish our ending would finally be a happy one, but I won't think about that today, I'll think about it tomorrow because after all tomorrow is another day!
